There are times in life where I struggle with relationships. Maybe you never feel this way, but I feel I can give to a relationship so much and never get anything back. I have friends that I have never hesitated to share my resources, my home, my network. If they ask me to participate or do something and I can make it happen I absolutely will. 

I guess that’s what I believe that friendships and having colleagues is all about. To be a yes, be willing. To want to support them.

I recently reached out to some of those people that I feel I’ve tried very hard to give always to. I needed something this time. And I asked.

Which, as a woman, it’s not always easy to ask for what you need. And I reached out and did it anyway.

Crickets.

Silence.

No response.

Not even an: I’m sorry, I can’t.”

It stings, hurts. And then I hear all the things your mind can say. Wondering if you’re being selfish by asking. Questioning whether you need to give more. Or hearing the whole: Karma will come from elsewhere and keep giving.

It seems that in a relationship though there needs to be give from both people. Am I wrong? Do you ever feel this way?

Here’s where I know I just have to set boundaries again. Here’s where I realize I could opt out of my relationships because it’s an old one that does that. And I new ones that are completely different. They are about yes, giving, and even asking to help before I’m even ready to say yes. Wow.

[Tweet “Remember to say yes in relationships that matter.”]

I have to focus my energy on those relationships and those kinds of people. Not the crickets.

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